Does Religion Poison Everything? by Andy Bannister

I just agree on what Andy Bannister, a member of the speaking team at Ravi Zacharias International Ministries in Toronto, Canada, is pointing out here. Indeed, it is not on religion but it is on our personal relationship with Jesus Christ. If our human heart has been transformed by Jesus Christ, everything will just be in order and fall into its right place. I know that its not easy to be a Christian but God, through Jesus Christ, will just made a way for you to overcome every struggle you will be facing. I really pray that each one of us will have our hearts transformed by Jesus Christ. 

TIME TO SAY GOODBYE

To the guy who has been part of my life for a little while. This poem is for him. I want him to know that despite everything, I know that my life is now moving on without him in it. 

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Broken heart is what I feel

The day he left me for real
When he said goodbye
For me it seems to be a lie

Tear drops from my eyes
Loneliness every night
Sadness and blues
Crying and restless nights

But as time passes by
He isn’t the one, I realize
For he is no longer in my mind
And I learn to smile at last

Today, I write this poem
'Coz it's time to say goodbye
And I want him to know
That I am now moving on


Shean is now signing off from him. I thank him for everything. 

THE CAUSE OF MY SLEEPLESS NIGHTS

Sometimes I just find myself typing words in my computer. I do not know exactly what to write but I am very eager to put my thoughts in words. Today is just another ordinary day because I am very sleepy again. If I did not have an 8 hour sleep, I am sluggishly doing some stuff which doesn’t require some analysis or any robotic tasks which doesn’t need to think while doing it. I wasn’t able to get my regular sleeps since I begin to meet new friends, some of them are my officemates and others are just people whom I never thought to be friend.

Kenneth Cagape

Last night, Keno went to our house for us to review. Keno is a new friend. I know him since high school but I just made him my friend just these past few weeks. How did I make him friend? Well, I just add him my friend in my facebook account because he seems to be nice with me last high school reunion. Then, out of the blue, he began to chat with me regarding some stuff in our office and asked me of vacancies, applications, etc. I, for one being friendly, accommodated him. We exchanged numbers, for he fears that if I only get his number, I might forget to text him regarding his application. And that was the start of this friendship. We texted for days that one weekend we agree to meet.  So, we went out one evening together with his brother Billy, and surprisingly I had fun with them. I enjoyed their company that a series of meetings have been made afterwards. Keno is a good friend I might say, not to mention that he made me happy and forget my blues and sadness for awhile.

Harlene Joy Baldostamon

Another person whom I became close in my life lately is JH or Joy, who is my officemate since October. But I wasn’t able to really know her until lately when we begin to go out with Kat, my highschool classmate and at the same time my officemate. She calls me madam and I do not know why. When I join their section bonding at Gumasa, we are always together that I cannot remember the time when we are not together. We had fun at the beach; we climb trees, swim a lot even if I do not know how to swim, climb big rocks which is surrounded by the water, and just walk without slippers. Also, we bond a lot last week that we go out almost after office except for the times that we don’t have a penny in our pocket. I actually miss her today and I never seen her since Saturday. She was absent for two days now because her grandmother died early morning of Monday. JH is a good friend who made me feel that I can be a child again. She thought me how to live a carefree life despite the dullness of my circumstances.

My sleepless nights were brought by these new faces in my life. They bring back to me the happiness that once been stolen. Their new friendship somehow gave me strength to move on with my life. And I want to thank them. 

When was the last time you’ve climb a tree?

When I was a kid, I really like to climb the trees at the backyard of our house or at my grandmother’s house.  Climbing trees is somehow an achievement for me as a little girl.

 

I really love to climb trees especially when I am with my little brother, Mac Mac. Somehow, his presence during my climb made me feel secure that I can climb it. There was a time when we are having difficulty in climbing the duhat tree at our backyard because of its complex structure and it is Mac Mac who helps me to go up. Each one of us will find a good position to eat the fruits while enjoying the view and the thumping of fresh air. Once, while having pleasure eating the fruits, I saw a green snake in one of its branches which is at the back of my brother; I panic and shout at him. Then, in just a split second, I am already in the ground with my body shaking out of nervous. When I saw that my brother is safe, we just both look at each other and laugh. I can still imagine how my brother and I went down so easily that made me laugh again. :D

Another remarkable experience of climbing trees is when we visited apong(my grandmother) in their house. My cousins invited me to go to the backyard and climb trees. So, I seek mom’s permission to go with them and she gave me her consent to go as long as I wouldn’t join them climbing the mango trees. Somehow, I followed my mom when I did not climb any mango tree, instead I climb another tree which I no longer remember its name. With a fear that an elder will see me, I was vigilant that when I saw my tito coming, I hurriedly go down. Unfortunately, my haste made me fell in the ground. I was so scared of my mom’s discipline if she will know that I somehow disobey her, so I tried to walk straight even if it’s painful.  Maybe I’m a good actress back then that I was able to hide it from my mom and go home safely without her knowing of what I did. But since hiding the truth bothered me so much; I eventually confess it to her.

Those are just my two cherished memories of climbing trees, a childhood experience that I will always bring when I grow up. I'm glad that there is no internet back then that I can still do those stuffs. 


And to answer the title of this post, I just climb a tree last weekend at Isla Jardin, Gumasa, Glan, Saranggani with my new friend, JH. My last climb reminded me how is it to be a child and to be carefree again. I love it! :)

Today, I write to say THANK YOU.

I thank again my Father in Heaven for everything that is happening in my life.


I thank Him for emptying my cup and pouring it with Himself. It hurts me at first when He took away all the things I thought I needed but today He made me understand that He is sovereign and He knows what is best for me. I thank Him for the emptiness because He is replacing it with Himself which is the Only One I needed to survive this life.

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I thank Him for His unfailing love. Despite my stubbornness and disobedience, his love covers and protects me. He never fails to show His love by not giving me what I want but what I need in this life.

I thank Him for His presence in my life. The Lord never leaves nor forsakes me. I was wrong when there are moments that I thought He isn’t there. In fact, He is always there watching and listening to my cry. All I need is to have faith in Him.

There are so much more to thank Him but above all I thank Him for accepting me as his daughter through His Son Jesus Christ. I thank Him for He is faithful in His promises that He, who began a good work in me, will put it into completion.

Thank you Lord for everything.  No words can express how much I am thankful because you have completed my life. Because without you, I am nothing. Thank you Lord.

MY PENSIEVE WITH KRYSTEEN MAE DE PEDRO

You’re now living for exactly 25 years and I want you to know that I am grateful for I’ve been a part of it, atleast for 15 years. You are someone whom I really treasured a lot, not because of the length of this friendship, but because of the deepness of what we’ve shared together.

As I’ve told to you in my gift, my sweet and precious memories with you is not enough to be written. But still, I want to blog those memories that I can still recall. So, here is the list of my treasured memories with you. 

• During our elementary years when we join the group of blooming seven where we still plan to build a tree house in Teshila’s compound, the time when I got mad with Adlyn and the time where I am so serious about my life.
• When we got lost in Davao Eden Park with Mommy Ching, Ate Flo, Daphny and Geraldin, we actually got tired walking and walking in the trail.
• When I got angry with you and told you that you don’t understand Chen at one of our classes in highschool. It was the time when Eden and I are quarrelling which you caught yourself in the middle.
• We are very much enthusiast when it comes to Harry Potter that we exchange letters using harry potter stationary. Back then, you are Cho Chang and I am Hermione Granger. But both of us didn’t end up with Harry Potter.
• When we do our highscool projects together, do you still remember those times that faith joy is always our group mate? From research project which is about killing those cockroaches, to Romeo and Juliet play where I always got angry with Kuya Enyek who acts as a Romeo back then.
• When we went to Lake Sebu last December 2010 together with Herman, Enyek, Mahal, Lance, and Amie, we actually had fun especially noong nagzipline tayo together. Ginawa pa tayo ni kuya photographer na superworman sa mga posts natin. 
• When we went to Jollibee together that you write those plans in Jollibee tissue.  Andoon pa nga iyong plan natin to hike together with May Che.  Two months from now, one year na iyon and we still did not climb a mountain.
• When I just text you that we have to meet after office hours, you wait for me at the Capitol as I travel from my upper valley office. We just walk along alunan avenue or eat at trishas burger, Jollibee, arjec siomai house, basilios or anywhere we want. Sometimes we just meet at KCC or Ace just to talk about what is happening in our lives but most of the time, it is I who talk. Thank you for listening.

Most of all, one thing that I will always treasure is when you are just there willing to accommodate me during my happy and sad moments. You are one of the best people I have met in this life. Thank you for walking with me for the past 15 years of our 25 years. Lovelots Chen. 

Happy 25th birthday! Cheers to our friendship and to our lives. :)

Farewell to my 24th year

Today is the end of my 24^th year and I decided to contemplate about what happened during my 24^th year here on earth. Then, I begin to compile its highlights through a picture.

It has been a significant year for me since I have made decisions which taught me to give up some things and face new challenges in life. Also, it was a year to appreciate life as I celebrate each day with new and old people in my life.

It was a year to say hello to a new romantic relationship and say goodbye before I will be turning 25 tomorrow. The experience had taught me how to love without being afraid to be hurt.

It was year where I decided to quit my job and go home. I left Maxima and my spiritual family in QC. It was a tough decision for me which cause me a series of sleepless nights as I made that choice. Before I went home, my VCF family had given me a birthday and farewell party.

Because of that decision, fortunately I was given a chance to work in SOCOTECO-I where I welcomed so many new faces in my life. I have met new and wonderful people who have been my support system during the transition.

With my new work, it had provided me opportunities to travel to the beautiful Palawan. Also, it made me go back to UP again when I was given a chance to participate in one of the trainings given by UP National Engineering Center (NEC).

Lastly, I’ve been with my family and high school friends for most part of my 24^th year. With them, they made my life more colorful as I attended different occasions, such as birthdays and weddings. Many times that I know I have hurt them, but still have loved me for being me. Whatever my season during my 24th year, my family and friends are always there for me and I thank God for it.

There are so many new things happened in my life. And these new things had thought me how to live this beautiful life which God has given me. Throughout my 24^th year, I have experienced a tough but a meaningful life.  And those experiences had mold me to be who I am right now and will help me to be ready as I face my 25^th birthday tomorrow.


So before I bid farewell to my 24th year, I want to say thank you for all the people who's been part of it. Because without you, my life would be different. 

LONELINESS IS CREEPING AT MY BED

These past few days, there is a part of me who is afraid to go home early. Not because I am angry with someone in our house but because I don’t want to go to my room. Because whenever I go there alone, a jar of negative emotions will come, and most of it is the spirit of loneliness.

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The moment I sit on my bed, I begin to ponder about my situation. I ask myself if I can still survive given my limited resources, my dry relationships and where living seems to be an obligation. And every time I thought about it, I can only see the dark side of my life. It seems I am surrounded by darkness and the only light remain comes from a piece of my broken heart. And that piece is my only hope, that piece is the hope that no one or nothing can ever separate me from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus, my Lord.  

The hope that remains in me began to spread as I cry to the Lord.  I shout all my concerns to Him for my soul is downcast and weary. I ask Him to vindicate me just like what David did in psalms. I pray and I continue to pray. Until I see my heart to be whole with all the stitches over it. It seems the only piece of my heart had affected every other piece.  Then, when my tears are gone, I begin to sleep.

However, I still wonder why I still wake up around 3 am every day. Fear sneaks at me every time I wake up during that time. Last night, I woke up and notice that my sister was not in her bed and all I can see is darkness. I cried again, I got my phone and went to the master’s bed room and saw my sister and mom sleeping. I join them in the bed. Then, I wake up around 6:00 am to start my day, with a fear of going to sleep again.  

I am not sure when the first day I begin to experience this loneliness creeping at my bed. But one thing I am sure and certain, I think it will still continue until the time that my heart begins to heal completely. And I believe that absolute healing will only come at the time when my God would answer me. As for the time, I don’t know. But I am hoping every night that He will answer for I don’t want that loneliness come near me again especially before I sleep.