Jr and Shean Forever

When it comes to my own wedding, I have so many wants. I want it to hold it at the beach but sometimes I want it to hold it at the garden. I want it to be secret but sometimes I want to shout it to the whole world. I want a motif where my guest should only wear white but sometimes I want it to be full of pastel colors. But there is one thing that I am very much sure of, I want to be wed with the person I love most and who loves me most.

And exactly on May 18, 2016 at 4:00 in the afternoon at Villa Amor Plaza Hotel, Koronadal City, in front of the Lord, my family and my friends, I vowed to be a wife after God’s own heart to a loving and God fearing man named Roberto Enrijo Munar Jr.

I cannot express into words what I feel that day especially when I am about to have my wedding march. I believe that I have mixed emotions; there is excitement because my dream is coming true, anxiousness because in just a short time I will be a wife. After all, it is a life changing decision.

During my bridal march, I wanted to cry but I tried not to because my bestfriend, Krysteen, my make-up artist, Madam Ar, and our coordinator told me to cherish the moment while I am walking in the aisle towards the person I am about to marry.  And so I did. I can still remember how I walk, how I approach my parents and how I see him waiting for me at the altar.

What I love about our wedding is the uniqueness of the wedding rites. Although I memorize my vow but then there are still words I uttered that I did not prepared to say. I also thank our officiating minister to give us the chance to say our words to our parents and how he let our parents speak to both of us. Also, I thank the officiating minister in giving us words of wisdom on how to sustain our marriage and that is to prioritize the following: Put God first, Put Husband/Wife second, Put Children third, Put Family fourth and Put others as last.

Above all, I want to thank God because despite everything, He has given me a wonderful and a memorable wedding. At the end of the day, it doesn’t really matter what color is the dress of my bridesmaids is or where it was held, what really matters most is that we do it with the person we love and it is blessed by our Father in heaven.

Turning 29

I love the way you love me, I love the way you smile at me. – Don Mclean, Birthday Song

11 years ago when I was still young, this song has been sung to me by my college crush, Stephen, at our Dormitory. I am living away from my parents when I turn eighteen years old, thus I did not get any debut party. But my friends in the dorm, especially my roommate, Sheena, made a way for me to have my own 18 roses. The last rose has been given by my crush in the evening of my birthday where candles are surrounded by me, and he sang the birthday song while playing the guitar. Because of that, my 18^th birthday became memorable. I even picked a petal of each rose and store it in my scrapbook.

And tomorrow I will be turning 29 years old, the last year where I can still tell myself that I am still part of the twenty’s. I am thinking of doing something different in my birthday but I can’t think about it now. All I know is that I will have a simple celebration tomorrow with my fiancé, JR, and with his family. He will be arriving tomorrow, thus I am excited of seeing him again. I will be thanking my fiancé for loving me despite my imperfections in our relationship. Also, I will be having my celebration with my family tomorrow night where I could also thank my parents for supporting me in every endeavor in this life. And most of all, I will celebrate it with my Saviour and my Father in heaven. I will be thanking God for this great life that He is giving me.

No matter how age we will be turning the next day is and no matter how we celebrate it and how we plan to celebrate it, I think the most important thing to do is to thank God for giving us another year to discover His greatness in our life. And I do and will always do.

11 years ago, the song seems to be just a song sung by a guy expressing his feelings to a girl. 

But today, the song seems to be a song that God is singing to me or a song that I can sing to God depending on what part of the lyrics. I am always thankful to God because He opened my heart and mind to receive Him into my life. I just want to pour out all the praises and worship to Him.

And so, turning 29 means being thankful to all the people who loves me and most especially thankful to God for everything.

My Second TV Exposure: More Close Up Version

I can still remember my first exposure in the national television. It was when I was in college where our group was asked by the media to take a video where we will be exchanging gifts for a Christmas station id of MYX. After that event, whenever I go home, some of my high school batch mates will tell me that they’ve seen me on TV and they are so proud of it. They thought that I am auditioning on something or what. They actually didn’t know that I was just at the right time and at the right place when it happened.

And now here comes another exposure where I am interviewed and aired in our regional news. Again, I think the same thing happened that I don’t have a choice but to say yes. Although I’ve said no for several times but because all of the people that should be interviewed is not available and I am the only one left, I have no choice. After the interview, I am shaking because I think my explanation sucks and I feel like an idiot. I don’t know but I am not just used on speaking of my mind to public. I’d rather write than speak my thoughts because I just can’t compose my thoughts properly whenever I am speaking. But then again, I have no choice but to do it. So, my interview was aired by ABS-CBN SOCKSARGEN on January 26, 2016 at the TV PATROL SOCKSARGEN Program. I didn’t watch the program because I am really embarrassed with it.  But a good friend posted a picture of me in the TV with a tag line, “Artista nay yan”. Just like some of my friends before, she is proud of my exposure while I am very ashamed of it. She told me that the interview went okay so I tried to watch the video. After watching, I know that I bear some bad news because of the brown out tag, but at the same time I am proud because I manage to compose myself. And so here is to my second exposure in the TV. I think twice is enough.

Disconnect to Connect

This is the name of the facebook page of my sister as part of her requirements in her college degree. I am just amazed on how technology uses us to be close to the people away from us but it also uses us to be far from the people around us.

Disconnect to Connect is a page encouraging all the technology savvy to disconnect for a while in order to connect to the people around us. 

I was known to be a person who keeps on posting in facebook. I am addicted in posting my thoughts, what I am going through and almost all of the activities in my account. Thus, I tried to include it in my fast this year by deactivating my facebook account for a week. Whenever I feel the urge to post, I prayed, wrote my thoughts in a paper or talked to a friend. I actually miss seeing facebook posts but I tried not to peek in my page even just for a week.

When the prayer and fasting is over, I activated my account but I tried not to post any activity on it. Instead, I just like and commented in the posts of other people. Eventually, it became part of my system that I don’t usually look at my phone.  I became more connected with the people around me especially those who are really close to my heart.

I actually love it when I’m literally out of social media. I love it when I don’t post anything and my facebook friends are just curious. Some of my friends actually asked me why I’m no longer posting and they also began asking me how’s going on in my life. Those questions became actual conversations; and with those conversations, there are interactions; and those interactions are far way better than posting in the social media.

And so, I am promoting this facebook page to everyone else, to create awareness to everyone who is like me before, to encourage them to disconnect to social networks, and connect to the people around them. 

Deuteronomy 28:13

“The Lord will make you the head, not the tail. If you pay attention to the commands of the Lord your God that I give you this day and carefully follow them, you will always be at the top, never at the bottom.”

I was able to read these words again during my quiet time this week. I came to think about it again and came to realize that this is the prophetic message given to me several years ago before my graduation. Although it is not really the exact words, rather it says more like: The Lord will make you the head, not the tail. He will bring you from one nation to another, to solve problems. You will always be at the top, never at the bottom, as long as you continue to obey in Him. But I am not really sure about this one either, it is just the thought that I just remembered.

I never expected this to happen in my life, I never dream to be a place where I am right now. I did not expect to become a department head in my office with my age. I feel so young that sometimes I feel that I don’t deserve this position. But I know that God really indeed put me in this position for a reason.

And as I write at this very moment, I am filled in awe of His greatness in my life. I am not sure if He is referring for my career or my ministry when the prophetic message was delivered before. Actually, when I received the message before, I really thought that He is referring with my ministry as I became a Victory Group Leader and as a head in the Admin-Support Ministry.

But whenever I look upon my situation, at this moment, it is not just the ministry that he meant, but He also includes my career. It surprises me because I never thought about it for a very long time until I stumbled upon this verse again. I then realize that the prophetic message I received several years ago just came true today in my career life.

I didn’t have a copy of the prophetic message given to me several years ago but I remember this verse when it was delivered to me. And I am really so thankful for God is Sovereign and what He meant several years ago is still what He meant today. It is such an honor to serve a God who is constant and loves us for who we are. Truly, I want God to be glorified in my life. Praise be to God forever!

Psalm 3

“Lord, how many are my foes! How many rise up against me! Many are saying of me, “God will not deliver him.” But you, Lord, are a shield around me, my glory, the One who lifts my head high. I call out to the Lord, and he answers me from his holy mountain. I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me. I will not fear though tens of thousands assail me on every side. Arise, Lord! Deliver me, my God! Strike all my enemies on the jaw; break the teeth of the wicked. From the Lord comes deliverance. May your blessing be on your people.” - Psalm 3, A psalm of David when he fled from his son Absalom.

I’ve been studying the life of David lately and I can really relate to his story. Just like David, I am a person who speaks my heart to God. Every emotion and feelings that I have whether I am happy, I am angry, I am bitter, I am sorry; I tell it to Him. I confess my sins to God, if there are things I’ve done that is not pleasing to Him and if there are things that I supposedly do but I didn’t have the courage to do it. Just like David, I am sorry for all the things I’ve done and didn’t do that doesn’t please Him.

Last year, I was put in a position where I am not sure I can handle of. I tried my best to be the best that I can be. But due to some of the things happened and for some unpopular decisions, I feel that some people whom I considered friends betrayed me. And I feel so hopeless whenever I think about it. I am in a position where I don’t know who are my enemies and my friends anymore. I don’t know how many are my foes and those people who rise up against me. There comes a time when I want to give up but whenever I think about it, God is telling me not to.

I thank God that through studying David’s life, He is telling me of the things that I should do just like what David did when he was betrayed by His own son, Absalom. There was a time that I run from war because I am afraid that I will lose the battle. But I am reminded that no matter where I am, there is war. Because we live in a cruel world where we need to face war every day. And though I don’t know anything about it, I know that I am going to win because my battles are not for me to fight, it is God who fight for me. No matter what, I believe that I am His anointed daughter, I have His Holy Spirit that will guide and help me every step of the way.

I also love on how God uses people, my real friends, to encourage me in every situation that I have. A friend actually told me these words: "Your faith is your strength actually. You are indestructible, unshakable because of that." Upon hearing this, I decided to to surrender to God my battles; I believe that my faith in Him is my strength and it is through it that I am going to win. I claim for victory in Jesus.

And so, Just like David’s prayer in Psalm 3, I also pray it right now. I claim for His deliverance because I know He will deliver me from my enemies. I shall not fear though tens of thousands assail me on every side, because my God is a great God who will deliver me. He will bless me for I am His. Praise be God forever.

Dare to Believe

I am in my fourth day of prayer and fasting this year and I am just so amazed on how God filled me with His Holy Spirit. My body is weak but my Spirit is full. This year series is about daring to believe of God’s promises in my life.

I am facing a mountain in my life right now and I am very much confident that God will be able to move that mountain through me. I know that everything happens for a reason and all the more I want to be positive on it. I am declaring that all negativity will be released in my life, instead the Spirit of positivity will just overflow in me this 2016.

My 2015 ended with a very tough ride but I am always glad that God’s grace and mercy overflows. Even it ended that way, I’ve seen so many miracles and blessings that come in my life.

And now here comes 2016, a year where I am not sure what will happen to me but I know with certainty that God will never leave me nor forsake me as He promised. I believe that this year will be a year where all His plans for my life will come into pass, that all of my faith goals will happen as it comes from Him. 

This 2016, I claim for good health, protection, prosperity and abundance in my life. I claim for a wedding with my fiance, JR and to be happily married with him. I claim for a house and business of our own. I also claim to travel in different places in the country and outside the country. 

Aside from my personal faith goals, I also claim for abundance, prosperity, good health and protection of my family and loved ones. I pray for household salvation that God may use me to be His living testimony to my family and I pray that God will open their hearts to the truth. I claim for a good and healthy relationship among family members.

Also, I claim for excellence in the job that I do as it reflects of who my God is. I claim for a promotion and protection in my career. I also pray that this year will be a stress-free workplace. I claim that I will have a good relationship with my staff and co-workers.

This year, I am convince that God will use me in my church as I am going to join bible studies in the church and be more involve by helping in kids ministry. I pray that God will use me more so that He will be glorified more in my life.

I know that I've got a lot of faith goals this year but I know that God will be able to do everything as I continue to have faith in Him. Because this year and for the rest of my life, I am fully convince that God is able to do what he had promised.