Seek Ye First

 Here I am again.

Confused with what to do. There are so many thoughts entering my mind. I know I need to write. I need to form my thoughts and decide.

For the past years, I am struggling with what to do. Part of me wants to go back and build a career again and help my husband financially. But part of me wants to be at home, take care of my kids and build them up as a person God wants them to be. And now I’m struggling because I want both.

I asked the Lord on what to do. An opportunity has given for me to build my career again, should I grab it? Or should I continue doing what I am supposed to do? I know inside my heart that the Lord wants me to continue what I am doing but as I look at my husband, I also want him to stay here with us. I pray for guidance, I pray for wisdom, I pray for strength to do what I am supposed to do.

While waiting for His answer, the Lord keeps telling me to go back to His promise. And that I shall seek Him first and all these things shall be added unto me. Yes, the answer is to seek Him first and everything shall be in place.

I thank the Lord for reminding me of His promise. I ask the Lord for forgiveness for allowing fear to enter in my mind. I pray for faith that can move mountains over my life. Surely, He will provide all the things I need while doing His will.

Thursday are exciting because of these great women who are willing to know God more in their lives. These ladies might not be perfect in their own ways but they have the heart to get to know Jesus. I feel so blessed to see them grow every day as I also learn from them. 

This Thursday, we just ended our Live To Tell series. From the word of God and from the experience of these single ladies, I've realized so many things. 

First of all, we are called to share the gospel with others. We share because it is valuable and it has a significant effect on our lives. We share because we want others to experience the same and we do not want them to miss it out. 

Second, we should not be ashamed of sharing our testimony despite our imperfections. Let us remember that God gives us the power of the Holy Spirit to speak the right words while we share. We should not be afraid of rejection because it is not us who are rejected, but it is the One who sent us.

Third, our goal is not to lead other people to heaven. Our purpose is to lead them having a relationship with Jesus. Heaven will not be heaven for the people who don't have any connection with Jesus Christ. Let us remember that eternal life starts in following Jesus. It is what the famous John 3:16 says. 

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."

And lastly, God called us to be salt and light here on earth. May the light that we shine is not for us. Instead, it is for Jesus to shine in our lives.

I believe that these ladies are the living testimony of how great and how awesome is He. 

ID Number 10041, Signing Off

It was really hard for me to leave SOCOTECO-I. 

For the past eight years, it has been a home to me. I enjoyed working in the cooperative because it made me grow as a person. The people I've worked with are considered my family. Because of this, I intended to stay for good and for the rest of my life. 

But now, I am walking away from the work I love and from the institution which I considered as my own. For those who  are asking why did I decide to go out, I will leave 
my answer in Proverbs 19:21:

 "Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails."

As I am signing off in this institution, I would like to express my sincere gratitude to the people who have helped me become the person I am today. I want to thank my former bosses: Ma'am Bing, Ma'am Ellen, Sir Bebot, Ma'am Ann, and Sir Edsel for helping me grow in my career. Your words of wisdom and the way you lead me have made me go this far. I also thank the people who were there supporting me behind my back especially Sir Mike, Aning, Sir Ian, and Sir Willy. Thank you for rescuing me during stressful discussions and meetings. I also thank those who have me cry in one way or another as it helped me grow up as a person. I thank all of my friends for supporting and 
for making me laugh on this journey. To all of my staff and has been my staff for the past few years, thank you for trying to understand me for the unpopular decisions and thank 
you for the support you've given me despite our differences.

To the organization itself, I will continue to support you because I believe in your advocacies. May you continue to fight for rural electrification while doing your best to 
provide excellent service to all the member consumer-owners. I was there and I've seen how you've remain standing despite and in spite of everything.

While I am writing this, I cannot stop my tears flowing from my eyes. Leaving behind the people I've considered my family is never easy. But life is always full of choices. And I opted for this. I do not know what the future will hold me, but I trust the One who is above me. I know that God has better plans for me,  plans that would give me hope and future.

To SOCOTECO-I, Madamo guid nga salamat!